Who's the Ugliest of Them All?

Just when you think car designers have hit rock bottom, a fresh, new eyesore rolls off the assembly line and onto your neighbor’s driveway–with looks that make even your dog gag.

But… who’s the ugliest? That’s our question for you!

We’re accepting your nominations for the all-round, butt-ugliest ride currently in production.

2013 Honda Crosstour @ the 2012 New York International Auto Show
The front end of the Honda Crosstour reminds our pals at cars.com of “the before photo in a rhinoplasty ad.”

Share your nominee and tell us why you think your suggested heinous ride deserves the dubious honor of being numero uno most vile.

We know you’ll have some great suggestions-- after all, it was one of our readers who once pointed out that comparing the Pontiac Aztec to a toad is an insult to toads.)

We’ll be the final judges, too. Why? Because no one knows ugly like the two of us who, as our sister never lets us forget, have “faces made for radio.”

Tom and Ray Magliozzi

Click and Clack, the Tappet Brothers

P.S. Remember, this has to be a car that’s currently in production. Why? Otherwise, the AMC Pacer would win in a blowout.

The Kia Soul is by far and away the ugliest car ever. The Aztek is a marvel of design compared to this half designed old shoe. And to boot, they paint it in that puke lime green. Oh yeah, no contest.

The Dodge Caliber is the ugliest car I’ve ever seen or sat in. I’m not sure it’s in production in 2013, but it was in 2012. I was given it as a rental car about two years ago and it felt like it was hunkering or hulking over me. It was so bad I had to return it to the rental place in about an hour and get something else - I forget what I got instead. Even when I see them on the road it seems to me they’re hunkering over themselves. I am in general not a fussy person or a fussy car person.

Fiat

On the other hand, about the KIA Soul - when I first saw the ads I thought: Ugh. But then as I’ve seen them in the ads and on the road, I’ve come to find them charming, particularly the green ones. I think they’ll be adored like old and new Beetles in about ten years. That’s my prediction.
There was a recent New Yorker magazine cover which showed an airplane passenger trying to push a green one into an overhead compartment. For some reason I found this added to their endearingness.

I came to like the Scion xB toaster over time, so I thought I would also eventually like the Cube. No luck, that square-corner design doesn’t grow, it mutates.

The Ford Focus. What is it with the modern car designers who feel that the front end of a car needs to look like the air input nacelle for a turbine or jet engine? Mazda started this with their "smiley face " cars.

The Nissan Cube which, for me, has taken the place of the Isuzu Trooper (the first generation in particular) is just ugly. The design is no more innovative than taking a shoe box and putting wheels on it. That was my first impression of the the Trooper and is now of the Cube. I don’t think I will ever see either one of them in any other way. The Cube’s asymmetrical rear window that curves around the side doesn’t help one bit! It makes me think the designers just waited to see what their kids put together with boxes and Lincoln Logs and then took directly to their drawing boards without trying to refine it at all.

Lincoln MKT. This is what luxury is!? I hope the paper bag I’ll be wearing over my head while driving it comes encrusted with diamonds.

Not to be a total buzz-kill, but as my mom always told me: beauty is in the eye of the beholder and true beauty lies within. Since the same would apply for ugliness (even for inanimates…autos) asthetics will be subjective; but the truly ugly car is every one with a drunken fool driver within.
By the way, Stephen Colbert’s Stretch Hummer should at least be considered for Miss Congeniality.

Infiniti QX SUV is my pick for the ugliest production vehicle at present. Several reasons for this choice: a visceral reaction of fear and loathing when seeing this auto; a Vogon was seen driving and reciting a poem to the vehicle’s loveliness; the thought that production staff put the vehicle together to see if buyers will purchase anything if it cost enough.

I think the Cube is the epitome of ugly. My niece has a bile-green one, and the only silver lining I see is: an accident wouldn’t make it look any worse.

The new Ford Escape looks awful in pictures, in person it might just look like every other miny ute. Chevy’s Spark has headlights that are pretty hard to get past. I don’t understand all the insults to Porsche’s Panamera’s looks it’s not a 911 and that’s OK with me.

Fiat makes a vehicle similar to the Soul, Cube or the Scion, etc. It is tall and ungainly, and in my opinion the ugliest thing on wheels. It’s not sold here, but very popular in Asia and Europe. Very easy to park, but quite top heavy.

Nissan Cube, hands down, a cartoon car. Also, any Subaru ever made and most of the Infinity line, especially the Q45

How did it take so long for the Nissan Cube to get a vote? And yes, the Infinity Q45 is a real stinker too. Schmutz has a good eye.

The ugliest car in America is the BMW 550 GT, I don’t know what the heck BMW was thinking when they released this vehicle. Some high paid executive actually signed off on putting this atrocity into production, or should I say “former” high paid executive. The only thing worse than this car are the people that drive them. I don’t know why anyone would even consider test driving this car. Anyway based on price (70K BTW) and the looks, this is the ugliest thing on the road. This should be the winner.

First of all, it HAS to be a Nissan, which aside from the Xterra and the Z cars, makes the ugliest cars on the planet. I nominate the Nissan Juke. Its poke-up lights give it a strong resemblance to a hippopotamus.

^

Why do you think that most people refer to it as the Nissan JOKE?
The biggest problem is that many people are vomiting when they see it, as they just don’t see the humor in that joke.

PriusV