From the staff Bio’s
John “Bugsy Sebastian Mr. Height Sweet Cheeks Free Lunch Twinkle Toes Donut Breath Hula Hips Gigabyte Make That Two Triple Cheeseburgers” Lawlor is the Technical Advisor for Dewey, Cheatham and Howe. What does that mean? How the hell do we know? We never see the guy! Actually, Bugsy is one of the sweetest guys you’ll ever meet. He shows up while we’re on the air with a couple of dozen donuts. Fortunately, this is an assignment for which “The Bugster” is admirably prepared, having worked as a Boston police officer for more than a dozen years.
Bugsy has had a long and sordid career in the automotive world—beginning as a prepubescent punk, drag racing his '63 Corvette Convertible on Route 1 outside Boston. He even had his own automotive radio show on Boston’s WBZ for several years—until the station manager over there found out.
Bugsy is also in charge of dealing with all of the auto manufacturers and arranging for the new vehicles we test drive. For example, let’s say we test drive the new Mercedes E 320 for three months. Then, on the show, we’ll say something like, “What a hunk of Nazi junk—I’d rather have a Taurus” It then becomes Bugsy’s job to explain to all the irate German executives that Tommy was having a hemorrhoidal flare-up and has no recollection whatsoever of having made such remarks.
In his free time, J.Bugsy S.M.H.S.C.F.L.T.T.D.B.H.H.G.M.T.T.T.C. Lawlor scours the planet in search of his next free lunch. As listeners to our lousy show know, we report back each week as to where he happens to have located that week’s gratis repast. At his sprawling homestead, nicknamed “Bugsyworld” by the Car Talk staff, Bugsy is amassing an extensive collection of “antique car memorabilia” - A.K.A junk.