Best answer for that type of question.
The ones that always get me are the ones that say “My check engine light is on, I’ve replaced the MAF, o2 sensors, plug wires, coolant sensor, plugs, fuel filter but my car STILL runs bad, What could be wrong??” When one of us asks what codes the computer set, the OP responds “I’ll get it scanned tomorrow and let you know.” Nothing like throwing parts at it, right??
transman
There was one just a week or so ago which read something like this: “Shifting problems, what could be wrong”?
transman
The ones that always frustrated me were ones where someone asked a question…then later ADDS very very important information that changed everyone’s opinion of what the problem is.
Ah, clever. The first haiku. Excellent.
Welcome back Mike.
Where have you been?
In and out of the country on business…where internet was spotty at best…and in most cases non-existent.
My favorite is my computer won’t boot, after 15 minutes of checking connections etc., no I cant see that because our power is out.
Well, at least he narrowed it down to the clutch or transmission!
Those are the guys from the Ready, Fire, Aim! school of auto repair…hope they’re not also hunters!
post this on your wall 
then there’s always the lovable BOFH:
http://www.theregister.co.uk/odds/bofh/
?
Guy walks into parts store
guy: i needs a part for my goosete
me: what car?
guy: goosete
me: no such car, you drive it here? lets look
me: thats a pontiac 6000 and the trim level is an STE
guy: yeah man, thats it
…OR…
guy drives in and wants a part for his buick deuce and a half. coworker told him thats a collectors item since everybody else drives a deuce and a quarter.
for you younger folks thats a Buick Electra 225
Pontiac Goosete! Points for worst mangling of a car’s name.
“It hucklebucks!” I’ll never forget that one as long as I live.
Translation, please?
pep boys says breaks need fixed to pass inpsection and are to expensve. how do i change breaks myself.
I haven’t heard the term “hucklebuck” since I was in the Army. I’m assuming it still refers to the same thing 
This one really happened:
Customer: How much for new exhaust?
Me: What kind of vehicle?
Customer: It’s a '95 Chevy.
Me: What kind of Chevy.
Customer: Pickup.
Me: What kind of pickup?
Customer (becoming slightly irritated): Full size!
Me: Half ton? 3/4 ton? One ton?
I could continue, but will only say things kept getting more heated when I tried to find out other things that would affect the price, like engine size, extended cab or not, short bed or long bed, and what he had in mind for the exhaust, be it OE or custom. He finally got his estimate, but was too frustrated by his own ignorance to want the work done.
Also, I have seen this one on here a number of times, and have had it presented to me on a number of occasions: “My car is making a funny noise. What could it be?”