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Auto Tranmission Dilemma

I have been a stick shift driver for the last 33 years. I just bought a car with automatic transmission. I am having a problem coming to a stop. I feel that I should do something like get out of gear and put into neutral. My question is will I wear out my transmission by moving in and out of neutral when I come to a stop. Or is it better to keep it in gear at a stop and keep the brakes applied.

Leave it in gear. Shifting the transmission into neutral and then back into gear (while it may come across as a very sublte bump) is actually slamming the clutches together with high pressure fluid.

You’re also jolting halfshafts or U-joints as the case may be along with jolting differential gears and motor mounts.
Leave it alone; you’ll get used to it.

Much better for the car to leave it alone.  It is not designed to be put in neutral at every stop.

Time to adapt to the new car. Forget shifting to neutral at stop lights. Just leave it in gear and keep your foot on the brake.

You’ll get used to it in a few weeks and it will feel normal.

You referred to a problem coming to a stop. Although you didn’t say it, does your car want to keep moving due to fast idle whenever you come to a stop? Depending on the car, your idle speed should be in the 500-800 rpm range.

My recommendation to break yourself in to using the automatic transmission is to go to a discount or hardware store and buy a plumber’s plunger. Next, visit an autoparts store or the auto parts aisle at WalMart and purchase a gear shift knob. Fit the gearshift knob to the plunger and affix the plunger using its suction cup to the floor between the front seats. Use this when you feel the urge to shift and leave the automatic alone. This will prevent wear on the automatic transmission and you can do all the “shifting” that you want. When you’ve completely broken yourself of the shifting habit, move the plunger with its shift knob to the rear seat and let the backseat drivers take over the shifting responsibilities.