Noisy Struts

When I go over bumps, the struts make a squeaking noise.

My car is a 1998 Cadallic Seville SLS. The struts are still working well.

Any suggestions?

If the struts have never been replaced, it may be time to do that. Get lifetime guaranteed struts replacements and be on your way. A good suspension inspection can isolate the issue, but I suspect you need new struts because they squeak due to being out of fluid.

Someone called my sister a noisy s… oh. Strut.

Are you sure it’s the struts making the noise? I’d be more inclined to suspect a sway bar bushing or spring insulator, or something of that ilk, right off the bat, as those are typically more noisy with old age than a strut. Especially if, as you say, the struts don’t seem to be worn out.