Worth a good laugh…and a good cheer for responsible parenting! See the article at http://www…index.html
I saw this a few minutes ago. Good job, Mom!
Outstanding!!!
Funny; as long as the parents bought the car, they can sell it for any reason they want.
From the kids point of view, if he doesn’t want to follow their rules he’s plenty old enough to support himself and buy his own car.
Three cheers for that mom!
That can go two ways: either he’ll learn a lesson, or he’ll be completely humiliated and alienated and never trust her again. When I was that age, I would have fallen to the latter.
Either way solves the problem (for both of them). At that age, I simple would have moved out the same day and never looked back (I hope my kids would be independent enough to do the same at 19).
However, I also would not have had my parents buying my car at 19; I bought my own (motorcycle) at 15 (eventually got a license at 16), I don’t recall asking permission.
Wish more parents would do that…
When I was that age, I would have fallen to the latter.
When I was that age, I was smart enough to dispose of the evidence rather than drive around with it under my seat. But, that is beside the point. Mom didn’t violate anyone?s trust. In fact, she has earned the trust of millions of adoring fans.
I hate to be the odd one out here (not really), but the concept of “parenting” a 19 year old is ridiculous. Any “parenting” should have taken place at least 5 years earlier. At 19, you are not parenting; you are supporting an adult who is living in your house. All she can do is set rules and tell him if he doesn’t follow them he’s no longer welcome there.
Everyone, think back to what you were up to when you were 19. How much influence did your parents have over your actions?
“When I was that age, I was smart enough to dispose of the evidence rather than drive around with it under my seat.”
When I was that age, my car smelled like bong water and beer, and no-one cared. This “kid” isn’t 12, he’s 19.
Everyone, think back to what you were up to when you were 19. How much influence did your parents have over your actions?
My parents surely did…as long as I wanted to live in their house…It was a lot cheaper living at home and going to college then trying to get an appartment or live in the dorms. And I was 21 at the time…and spent over a year in Nam…I have certain rules for my daughter when she comes home during the summer from college.
When I was 16 back in the 1950’s, I had a job that paid 60 cents an hour. I was saving my money to buy a car. When I had the money saved, I went to the Olds-Cadillac dealer and road tested a car in my price range–a 1940 LaSalle that was priced at $75. My parents made me take it right back and I was told to save my money. I didn’t even think again about buying a car until I was through college. I then purchased a 1947 Pontiac to take me to graduate school. It cost me $75, but I did have the interest on the original $75 that I didn’t spend on the LaSalle. Unfortunately, I think the interest money was eaten up buying oil for the Pontiac–it consumed a quart every 200 miles.
That’s not “parenting,” that’s setting rules for your house-guest. My parents also had rules at their house when I stayed with them, for example they didn’t want me sleeping with my girlfriend (who they knew I was living with) in their house. That was their right, but it had nothing to do with parenting. “Parenting” my 16 year old really means that I can control what happens in front of me. All the actual parenting ended years ago.
I guess that interacting with today’s average 19 year olds at the university where I work, I give them far less credit than you do. Many of today’s 19 year olds are going to college on Mom and Dad’s dime and still require guidance from their wise parents. The fact that your parents didn’t care that your car smelled like bong water and beer is really a testament to either the fact that you were more independent or that your parents simply didn’t care. Whichever is the case, I should hope that all parents don’t abandon their children when they turn 18. Some are ready to be independent at that age and some are not. They are not all the same and I don’t think that treating them all the same way is a good idea. I am glad that you turned out okay though, or is the jury still out?
I agree that some 19 year olds should be treated as adults, but I also think that good parenting requires different strategies for different circumstances. Some 18 year olds simply don’t have the emotional IQ to think as adults and I don’t think you are wise enough to tell EVERY parent the best way to raise THEIR child.
Congrats to the mean mom. There are way too many young people getting scraped off the highway because they do stupid things.
I agree that some 18 year olds need more “guidance” than others, which is certainly not the same thing as parenting. I hope my kids are independent enough to require very little guidance at that age. If they do, I hope I’m wise enough to give them advice without trying to “parent” an adult. I also hope that I’m wise enough not to tie any help they might need to following “my rules.” If I do make that mistake, I certainly hope they know enough to tell me to $$$$-off (they will, if I’ve taught them anything useful, it’s a heathy skepticism of all self-appointed “authorities”). Hopefully, they will come to me, if necessary, knowing I’m not going to turn into a “parent” as a condition of helping them.
What I did when I was that age was 100% my responsibility and had nothing to do with my parents, I did not ask for their permission for anything I did and certainly did not listen to their opinions. If I had gotten in any real trouble at the age, it would have been completely my problem. All they could have done was tell me to get lost (and I would have), but they didn’t.
I think we’re talking semantics here…Parenting is NOT CONTROLLING or punishing…Sure you may have to do that when they’re younger…But parenting is ALSO guiding, teaching. By setting rules to live by is a way of guidig and teaching.
I certainly wouldn’t tell anyone how to raise their CHILD, but I would tell them that treating a 19 year old adult as a CHILD is a complete waste of time and effort. Just maybe, his “emotional IQ” is a result of being treated as a CHILD. I have two teenager kids, and I do not have any delusions as to the amount of control parents actually have during those years. I do know that if I end up having to treat a 19 year old like a 13 year old, I have done something very wrong.