The reason most of the brake wear happens in the front is that, when you apply the brakes, weight shifts from the rear wheels to the front wheels as your momentum pushes the car forward. Depending on how hard your braking, the front brakes are doing 70-90% of the braking.
If you've ever ridden a motorcycle, and have taken the Motorcycle Safety Foundation's basic rider's course, you've manually controlled your braking distribution, using the right hand lever to apply the front brake, and the right foot to apply the rear brake.
The laws of physics make it impossible to even out brake wear between the front and the back. It's just the way it is.
Oh, and looking at your bicycle analogy, it's a lot harder to put yourself over the handlebars of a motorcycle (unless you're riding a sport bike) because you're dealing with a lot more weight, especially on a cruiser with a raked out front end.
If you really want to balance out your brake wear, the only way I can think of to do it is to brake gently so your car's center of gravity stays centered.