Oh bull@#$#@. Any time your mechanic starts giving you sci-fi explanations, you know he’s in way over his head.
“Then perhaps you should fire him and hire someone who knows what he’s doing?”
These guys are frighteningly incompetent. I’d be on the horn to Nissan corporate, and if I paid with a credit card I’d be talking to the CC company and asking for a chargeback if the dealership doesn’t refund your money. I might even call up the local TV stations, because they eat crap like this up and if you have this problem, lots of other people will too.
The thing is that car computers do not run Windows. They’re tested much more carefully than a home PC, and the ECU in any given car of the same year-make-model is the same hardware as the other cars of the same year-make-model, whereas your Windows PC has hundreds of thousands of possible configurations, the majority of which involve hardware that didn’t exist when the OS was released. I have seen a car computer crash during a routine procedure once, but that was on a BMW, and it’s because they couldn’t be bothered to include error routines because BMW engineers can’t fathom the idea that someone might connect a bluetooth phone that wasn’t on their list of approved phones. Non-German car companies don’t tend to have that kind of blindness. And at any rate, the idea that drilling a hole in a key fob will send out an EMP (because that’s the only way to fry the ECU from a distance) without frying every other circuit board in the general vicinity is ludicrous on a number of levels.