I'm with @texases on this, especially after you described the heavy highway traffic. Hybrids get excellent mileage in traffic. The EPA estimates are 38 highway and 34 city. It doesn't drop much. I drive 54 miles each day one way in a 2005 Honda Accord EX V6. I get about 30 mpg when I travel early to get low traffic in at least one direction. I have 183,000 miles and the car runs quite well. I want a new car, but mostly because it will need a new timing belt at 210,000 miles, and I'm not interested in putting $1000-$1500 into it at that point.
Anyway, you will get great mileage and it will be easy on the car. I'd go with the CR-Z. Get over your bad self if Mrs gleestuff wants to drive the Honda. If that's 40 miles one way, it is a grueling commute, especially in heavy traffic. If she is willing to do that, give here the choice.