3:39 a.m. Frigid engine. Hospital says:"Red lights and siren and HURRY!"

Robert; you appear to be living in world of your own. An engine block heater on a timer needs only 1 1/2 hours to get the engine warm, and consumes 1.5x.250(KWs)=.357 kilowatt-hours per night if you plug it in every night. Here that costs $0.16x.375=$0.06 or 6 cents per night.

If you want the car warm all the time, there are thermostatically controlled heaters that go on and off. I’ve lived in a cold climate for over 60 years and have never had a problem with having to start up a vehicle in cold weathr and using it quickly.

"Trolls R us?"
Then why are you reading?

Thank you, Ob.
I don’t have the money for a thermostatically-controlled electric heater.
But I have plenty of used outdoor bulbs with lots of life.
Likely not used very many nights.
I’m not worried about a fire. No combustibles.
The smoke alarm is tied into the house alarms.

Don’t wory about it!!!

Robert, these heaters are only about $30-$40 if you look around and they are extremely useful. IMHO this is a better solution, but do what you will.

Robert, these heaters are only about $30-$40 if you look around and they are extremely useful. IMHO this is a better solution, but do what you will.
Understood. Good idea. Wish I could fit it under the vehicle. Our garage has a high ceiling. It will not make the engine and transmission warmer but will heat the ceiling. I'd rather apply heat right where needed. Have nothing more efficient, and CHEAP, than outdoor floodlight bulbs.

You’re trying to heat the engine from the top with the heat lamps? Which doesn’t solve the cold transmission and oil.

I got two ideas which I will give one at a time.

The first idea is to use a place one of those old fashion dinner plate warmers under the crankcase and another under the transmsn, thermostatically controlled, Now I know these are getting rare so the alternative is too use electric skillets, filled with rocks (mass will maintain heat) placed at the proper positions. I am pretty sure that you and neighbors will have at least one or two E-skillets not be used.

"You're trying to heat the engine from the top with the heat lamps? Which doesn't solve the cold transmission and oil."
ThExpedition is always backed into the garage and stops against a wood chock.

The lamps will mount on a 2x6 on the garage floor and be spaced to shine straight UP onto the oil pan, transmission and differential.
Their height can be adjusted to clear anything under the SUV.

The lamps will reflect theiradiant heat where best.
I’ll cover the Expedition’s hood with a big blanket which also drapes over the grill.
So radiant heat will directly heat the parts and hot air will be trapped under the hood.

Your electric grills are also a good idea. I looked at some at Goodwill.
But I already have many outdoor floodlights.
If not enough wattage, more lamps can be added or thelectric skillets used.
My concern abouthe skillets was water dripping into them or on their thermostats. They are not waterproof and not to be submerged.

You didn’t like my 9 cats sleeping on the engine.
You didn;t like the LED flood lite idea, when you really need heat lamps, They do make LED-IR lamps
Now you don’t like the skillets because the controls can not be immersed in water- does your garage flood?
And you don’t like the plate warmer idea because you already have the flood lamps. Remember your lamps are glass, are a shock and fire hazard being close to the ground.

OK. I can live with your reasons.

Idea #2. Washlet Bidet. Hot water sprayed with hot air blow dry. Two spray wands for proper attack. Meter water, Timed drying, Multi-heat water and dry. Keeps the areas “where the sun don’t sun” free of salt, crankcase oil, and grime. Multi-temp-constant on seat that maintains warmth. Water Resistant and Sanitary. Ground Fault protected. REMOTE controlled. Everything you could want.

Idea #2. Washlet Bidet. Hot water sprayed with hot air blow dry. Two spray wands for proper attack. Meter water, Timed drying, Multi-heat water and dry. Keeps the areas "where the sun don't sun" free of salt, crankcase oil, and grime. Multi-temp-constant on seat that maintains warmth. Water Resistant and Sanitary. Ground Fault protected. REMOTE controlled. Everything you could want.
LOVE IT! Recently I.nstalled an AMDM Washlet bidet! $150 at Costco. http://amdmllc.com/?p=299 Had to install a defecated, I mean, dedicated GFI-protected circuit. Getting the cable up the wall and installing an outlet behind the toilet was the most difficult part. The money we're saving in using less toilet paper will pay for it.

We have two units, HomeTech, internet. We are on septic and the amount of solids is important.
You paid $150, with heated water? Costco?

"We have two units, HomeTech, internet. We are on septic and the amount of solids is important. You paid $150, with heated water? Costco?"
No heated garage. Butthe 3-levels of heated seat and 3-levels of heated water is great!

Still for sale at Costco.
Trying to get others to buy and I’ll install them.
Should start my own company:
Bob’s Bidets
You can pay us Tuesday for a bidet today!

I don’t see’em at Costco online. Soap dispenser, too. Does it do a wax job?

"I don't see'em at Costco online. Soap dispenser, too. Does it do a wax job?"
That be generation # 2.0.

I think there’s enough BS flying now that we all could use a bidet.

Alass, unable to find the unit online Costco. $150/ea? with remote?

"Alass, unable to find the unit online Costco. $150/ea? with remote?"
Oh. Maybe they were $249 and I bought when $50 off. Remote has pretty colored, blindingly BRIGHT, LEDs. In our cold house the heated seat is especially nice.

that’s still 50% off their online price.
Also $200 less for the one that I got for my father 4 years ago
$100 less than our non-remote units, 10 years ago.

At $249, You would do well to put a couple under the car and another couple above the car just for car washing.