As others have pointed out, we still don’t have a clear picture (at least I don’t) of what all is needed to get the vehicle up and running properly. I, for one, would really like to know.
Your engine is an overhead cam engine, all the 2000 T&Cs had them, so a “thrown rod” could only be a connecting rod, and that would, in fact, trash the engine…even if it’s still able to run aleit with lots of banging. A busted connecting rod will tear the bejesus out of the cylinder as it and the freed piston bang around in there. An engine does not have to be totally unable to turn its crank to be toast.
I can’t tell from this thread what’s really wrong with the engine. But it seems that this has caused a real battle in your relationship. That we can’t help you with. But I can suggest that your answering your wife’s post via a “reply” posting is an indication that it may be a good idea to work on more direct communication.
We’re not marrriage counselor’s here, but you both seem to be trying to get us to “side with you”. I’d suggest you both try to talk directly to one another, even if you need outside help to do so.
Meanwhile, if you really do pull the heads and diagnose the real problem, we’ll be able to advise you with that aspect.
And remember, you folks opened the door to the marital difficulties, not us.