Hit properly at the proper angle by 2,000 pounds of steel it takes very little speed to bend a frame. It’s about the density of the energy (in finite elements) and the time involved in the dissipation of the energy (amplitude and duration). And the ability of the particular struck spot to dissipate the energy based on these factors and the angle it was struck at.
One point. If hubby hit him, it’s hubby’s fault. Hubby was not allowing enough space between himself and the other vehicle for the conditions. If the frame’s bent, and it’s confirmed by the adjuster, the blame goes to hubby, not the poor fella in the ancient VW. Hubby needs to learn to leave more space.